Mysql and Postgres enter a NoSQL bar, but leave immediately because there is no table.
8 Likes
Why do programmers use dark mode?
Because light attracts bugs.
7 Likes
Not all about programming…
My friend told me to stop speaking in numbers…
But I didn’t 1 2!
Why did the robot go on vacation?
It needed to recharge its batteries
How do trees access the internet?
They log in!
What happened to the person who sued over their missing luggage?
They lost their case!
What do you call a machine that can monitor the power and effect of a good pun?
A SIGHS mograph
And measure the resistance with your “groan-hmeter
Some aquatic mammals at the zoo escaped…
It was otter chaos!
4 Likes
What was the programmer’s favorite musical note?
C#
What was the programmer’s other favorite musical note?
F#
4 Likes
That reminded me of this one.
Why do Java developers need glasses?
Because they don’t C#
4 Likes
Unfortunately, I failed my CompSci classes this year.
It’s because I’m non-binary
1 Like
Are you a monad?
Because when you are not here I feel the side effects.
4 Likes
['S','u','n','s','h','i','n','e']
An array of sunshine
2 Likes
Knock knock.
Race condition.
Who’s there?
3 Likes
Knock, knock…
Who’s there?
Pretty sure that is a UDP joke.
1 Like
… it’s me, Java!
I can always tell when I have been coding too much;
Not really a Dad joke, but one of Bram’s signature blocks in 2023:
Q. What happens to programmers when they die?
A: MS-Windows programmers are reinstalled. C++ programmers become undefined,
anyone who refers to them will die as well. Java programmers reincarnate
after being garbage collected, unless they are in permgen, in which case
they become zombies. Zimbu programmers leave a stack trace that tells us
exactly where they died and how they got there.
Bram Moolenaar - creator of Zimbu, Vim Script and Vim
2 Likes
I decided to go back to my ex-girlfriend.
segmentation fault
Explanation: Attempting to access a nonexistent memory address
1 Like
This year’s Fibonacci convention is going to be really special.
Apparently it’s as big as the last two put together.
3 Likes
Programmers typically avoid bars. They don’t like tabs.
2 Likes